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It’s hard to be strong about what you want. Being strong can be seen as selfish and arrogant, and who wants to be around that?

But what is the opposite of being strong in your wants? Someone who never gets what they want. The choice to not make choices will show you as a weak person. Confidence comes from knowing what you want, and how to achieve it.

To narrow it down, it also comes down to being specific about what you want.

How can you change this right now? Well, there is one choice that may come up in the next few days or weeks: “Where do you want to go to eat?” This is a question that comes up in my life a lot, and often, my response is “Well, where do you want to go?” Next time, try this: know exactly where you want to go, and observe the results. Often, if the other person will accept what you choose, and respect you for making the choice: you have become the leader, and the other will follow.

The other side of this is when the person says “Eh, I don’t want to go there”. Follow up with other choices. Remain in the lead, and you will earn respect.

Here’s another thought. Enter into a meeting prepared to state what you want, and how you plan on achieving it. You have become a leader by immediately taking control. Others will follow.

The downside to this is when you become a leader, you often stay that way, and will be counted on to lead in most occasions. Sometimes, I don’t want to be the leader, but it is often expected. You often are given responsibility in occasions where you just want to relax.

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